Sounds like a combination of setup and network issues. Before actually connecting with other first try the localhost connection and make sure that your setup is working fine. Then try the mirros (under public servers) to verfiy that your sound is received back fine. Only if both works fine you’ll be all set to connect. Apart from that on Windows you should not use ASIO4ALL – only do it with an external USB soundcard with a native ASIO driver. Anything else will lead to issues per se – especially with larger ensembles.